Monday, March 3, 2008

Crud...

SICK"I cannot go to school today,"Said little Peggy Ann McKay,"I have the measles and the mumps,A gash, a rash, and purple bumps.My mouth is wet, my throat is dry,I'm going blind in my right eye.My tonsils are as big as rocks,I've counted sixteen chicken pox And there's one more--that's seventeen,And don't you think my face looks green?My leg is cut, my eyes are blue--It might be instamatic flu.I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke,I'm sure that my left leg is broke--My hip hurts when I move my chin,My belly button's caving in,My back is wrenched, my ankle's sprained,My 'pendix pains each time it rains.My nose is cold, my toes are numb,I have a sliver in my thumb.My neck is stiff, my voice is weak,I hardly whisper when I speak.My tongue is filling up my mouth,I think my hair is falling out.My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight,My temperature is one-o-eight.My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear,There is a hole inside my ear.I have a hangnail, and my heart is--what?What's that? What's that you say?You say today is---Saturday?G'bye, I'm going out to play!" ~Shel Silverstein~

Well, never fear, I am NOT man sick...I am not even MOM sick. Please don't tell my boss...but I am my FAVORITE kind of sick. Be careful to proceed...as this gets a bit gross.

I mostly feel fine. I just have the crud! You know, where your sinuses are filled with nasty green gunk...that is constantly draining down your throat...then you are coughing up chunks...and as a result you have completely lost your voice!

As you can well imagine, a day of teaching without a voice would be quite unsuccessful. So here I sit at home. Let me tell you what today could look like...

I could clean my house...dust away the huge dust bunnies...I could start a March sewing project...I could go through my girls' drawers and pull out winter and insert spring...I could bake treats for the kids after school snack...I could make a wonderful 5 course dinner...I could scrub toilets...I could mop floors... I could... I could... I could.

Now, so far this is what I have done...

I read blogs...I 'check in' with about 10 regular blogs a day. I linked to 3 related blogs from the original 10 blogs...I had a cup of java...I ate a piece of toast...I looked at the dust bunnies...I looked at stacks of clean clothes...and I decided to write a new post.

My realistic plan for the day is to accomplish at least three items from the 'I could' list. I'm not going to promise which three they will be...they probably won't be the most important three either. I will probably watch some of the 20 Oprah's I have recorded. I will watch a Netflix movie that needs to be returned. I will sip on hot tea with honey and NOT talk. I will, at some point, against my better judgement, be lured into my cozy bed for a mid-day nap. I will enjoy this 'gift' of a sick day...where I am not feeling terribly sick...but need to stay home any way.

A penny thought: I wish I could keep a special sick lollipop in a protective zippie bag. You know...one that I could start today...much like a fine sour dough batter. I would suck on the lollipop for just a few minutes...contaminate it with laryngitis germs...and then about once every six weeks or so, I could pull it out...re-contaminate myself with my favorite sick germs...and treat myself to a day a home...alone. P.S. Did I mention...please don't tell my boss?

4 comments:

A Cop, A Teacher, and Two Princesses said...

Cristy and I were just talking about what the chances are that you didn't talk all day??? You are surely missed and we wouldn't want you to get something terrible like "man sick" over spring break.

Stacy B said...

I think teachers should stay home and take care of themselves more often but it's too hard to get things ready for a sub when you have the crud. I am glad you took the day to rest and not let yourself get man sick! Hope your feeling better.

Mom said...

Please be done with the crud by the time we meet in Sunriver. I've managed to be home for 4&1/2 days and have not come down with anything related to extreme weather change. Drink lots of tea and go to bed early.

Lindsay said...

You, my dear friend - CRACK ME UP!!

I love your whit, I love your sense of humor, and I love that you have a blog to share all of "penny thoughts" with the world!!

Hope that the crud is gone soon...